Home > Columnists > COMMIE GIRL WALKS TO HAWAII, HITCHHIKES BACK…AND ADMITS SHE PROBABLY OUGHTTA BROUGHT BEER

COMMIE GIRL WALKS TO HAWAII, HITCHHIKES BACK…AND ADMITS SHE PROBABLY OUGHTTA BROUGHT BEER

THE HITCHED RIDE BACK FROM HAWAII

BY REBECCA SCHOENKOPF / FOURSTORY.ORG

We couldn’t possibly bring beer to the party, despite Diane’s oft-stated insistence that we should. We had to walk a mile down a road with an average 25 percent grade—and that maxes out at 45 percent. (Easily the world’s steepest; some place in Wales that claims the honor is a laughable and piddling 40 percent.) Now think about the western end of Kanaan, where signs warn trucks about the dangerous six percent they’re about to experience. Watch downhill speed, trucks! Watch it good!

Why, yes, we were headed into the Waipio Valley on the Big Island of Hawaii, and mama no longer gets to bitch about poorness, not now, not ever—not that I would anyway. You know I don’t like to complain! So when Keoni at the Waipio visitor info center (“visitor info centers” are just stores that want to sell you tours and such) told us his auntie was having her a birthday party at the bottom of the valley, and that we should bring a gift and a card (he was very specific about the card) and meet his family and have some delicious home-caught pig, we all thought that was a marvelous idea. READ THE WHOLE STORY AT FOURSTORY.ORG

Advertisements
Categories: Columnists
  1. No comments yet.
  1. No trackbacks yet.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: